The horse you see just above this text is my very own horse named Nova. I have had a love for horses since a very young age. I worked at a few local farms, collected horse models, and took lessons for a short time. All that being said horses are extremely expensive to own. Unfortunately my parents just weren't able to feed the horse addiction of mine. After selling my first mare at 15 I realized I had to settle on the fact that this was it for a long time. That I was not going to be able to own a horse until after I was married and had kids. Maybe not even until they were all grown up and moved out. I became content with where I was at. As much as it hurt to not be involved with horses at all was hard. Until I turned 20 and I truly felt a tug on my heart. I prayed about this feeling and in turn planned for the purchase of Nova's freedom.
In the midst of this planning I was pursuing a relationship with a young man. I knew he was not a christian and did not share the same beliefs I did. However, I compromised what I knew was true so I didn't have to be lonely. This man was not supportive when it came to Nova. Due to Nova's condition he required a lot of my time and attention. Leaving very little time after work for me to do other things. Nova is an 18 Hand horse (72 inches from foot to back) who should have weighed around 1200-1300lbs. Nova in fact weighed 940-950lbs when I purchased him for $800.
Here is my nova Today after being in my care for almost 2 years.
The moment I was totally at peace with Gods plan and that it might not include a horse. God had other plans for me and for Nova. I believe He placed Nova in my life to help me learn to love myself again. He gave me a broken soul who needed my love. It gave me the opportunity to stop being so selfish and so focused on my own brokenness. My every day routine was changed and I stepped away from the relationship I knew wasn't what God had planned for me. Owning Nova gave me confidence in myself again that I had lacked for what felt like forever. I see myself in Nova more and more every day. A broken spirit crushed by those around him. Abandoned by someone he trusted to care for him. To this day he carries that baggage not only through outbursts of fear, but with scars on his legs. I can see him slowly coming around learning to trust in me, despite what happened to him in the past. He continues to eagerly accept what I have to teach him.
Psalm 30:1-11 "I will exalt you Lord, for You have lifted me out of the depths and did not let my enemies gloat over me. Lord my God I called to you for help and you healed me. For his anger lasts only a moment but his favor lasts for a lifetime. Weeping may stay in the night but joy comes in the morning. You made my royal mountain stand firm. You turned my waiting into dancing. You removed my sackcloth and clothed me in joy."
This is a praise I love to read out loud. I love how this verse acknowledges how God is the reason for everything good that has happened to me. God was the one who made it possible for me to afford the horse. He herd my cries for help and he knew the desires of my heart and like a good father made a way! Even when you are hoping and praying for something now or you have been for a long time. Give God your complete trust and I promise you he will never let you down. Just like Nova choosing to follow me in the arena, I chose to follow Christ even if it feels like he doesn't hear me sometimes.
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